adventures in powerwashing.

awkward moments in powerwashing:

• trying to figure out the mechanics of the brand-new powerwasher while sitting on my front porch... with an audience of retired neighbors, bikers, and pet-walkers all in attendance to watch me humiliate myself.
• forgetting my shoes inside.
• having to reach the spicket by traversing 5 feet of ornamental rock (barefoot) because i'm too stupid to go and get shoes on.
• the dance i do when i get the powerwasher hooked up. finally.
• getting honked at by an old guy driving by.
• hitting my big toe with a stream of water forceful enough to take off skin. don't ask how i know that.
• slinking inside to hide my shame after walking back over the stupid ornamental pokey-as-heck-rock to turn the faucet off in order to nurse my poor toe. 
• forgetting my shoes. again.
• trying to drag the powerwasher over to my car. figuring out that the cord doesn't quite reach... but continuing to try and aim the stream of water just right. then giving up, stomping back over to the plug and back into the garage, getting the cord stuck under the tire. tugging. wiggling. pullllling the stupid cord that refuses to budge. finally giving up and walking over to the tire. moving the cord an inch to the left. replugging. back out to the driveway. pulling the powerwasher over to the car. hose isn't long enough now. kink. undo the kink. back to powerwashing. random runner asks if i will wash his car next. big toe still throbbing. it'll snow in july in boise before i ever touch this thing again. 
• undoing the hose from the back of the powerwasher. apparently turning off the water does not mean there is no more pressure. walk back inside looking like i've had an accident. 
• finding out i only have 20 minutes before i meet with my new boss. (which went well. i get to do my favorite thing in the whole wide world and deal with baked goods all. day. long. best job ever? i think so.)

what i'm up to this month...

you know when people go through phases?
the years that i would only wear my hair in a ponytail...
or braids...
or that i haven't had the same hair color for over a year since my sophomore year of college...
like the time i went through my i-must-have-a-jeep-or-i-will-die phase? (oh wait... that one's still going...)
eating a bell pepper every day for lunch.
learning to play the guitar...

i am a creature of habit, while also being very fickle. 
how does that work?

but speaking of "phases", my mom has been doing some research on cold thermogenesis. 
my mom is definitely the expert on this (she has been doing most of the reading. i have mostly acted as the devils advocate here...) but what sounds like a ridiculous idea, actually is starting to make sense in my head. 
i mean... who in their right mind would ever take an ice-bath? i won't mention the fact that i tried it once when i was a freshman in college... it didn't last very long. cold showers i can handle! especially when it likes to linger around a very mild 100 degrees here...

why cold thermogenesis?
from what i have leeched from my mother, we are "programmed" to store fat during the summer, and burn it off in the winter. well... historically that has been the case. the problem with our current society is that we no longer are subject to our environment. we artificially create our environment. so the fat that we store in the summer... stays in the winter. and then packs more on the next summer... we never get that "hibernation" effect (you know, like bears in winter?) 
so what do you do? 
i know you're just dying to know what all this crazy talk actually means...
beyond the fat loss potential of cold thermogenesis, there is another "side effect". 
think of michael phelps... and swimming in cold water... or maybe the fact that lance armstrong has a gigantic fridge in his house where he exercises on his bike. is there anything significant about these two athletes? they seem to have tapped into some kind of superhuman "power" that enables them to be the best. according to dr. kruse (a neurosurgeon who is one of the main proponents of CT) there is a connection! check out this link for more info. 

more of my own observations to come! 
and i just might try this out... (but it might take some more convincing. i really like my hot showers...)

The Complete Cold Thermogenesis Guide
http://home.trainingpeaks.com/training-and-nutrition-plans/preview.aspx?planid=33738&af=trainingpeaks3%20
Doing this daily will speed up fat loss and recovery. It can enhance athletic performance. That is why Michael Phelps and the other Olympic swimmers train in 50 degree pools. Also Lance Armstrong trains in an industrial size freezer that he had installed in his house. Notes: COLD THERMOGENESIS (CT) This should gradually be added to the Leptin Rx reset protocol (not everyone will need this). CT training should be done at sunrise or after dinner. CAUTION: If you have a serious health condition, please consult a medical doctor before beginning a CT regimen. Immediately stop treatment if you experience light-headedness or a pale pink to white coloration of the skin. Cold Thermogenesis Benefits: Lower body fat Increase hormone levels Reproductive fitness! Fertility Reverse diabetes Cut food cravings Kill fat permanently Strengthen adrenal function Fix thyroid disorder Super immune function Deep sleep Pain management Sense of well being and better attitude Cut visceral fat first Promote cessation of eating disorders BEFORE every CT session: Eat a high fat and/or protein meal Immediately drink 16-32oz of ice cold water. DO NOT drink more than 32oz. Face Dunking: What you need: skin thermometer, a timer, ice, and a bathroom sink or larger bowl. Remove make-up or facial products Get the water between 50-55 degrees Dunk your face into the ice water and hold as long as you can Record time and dunk again Continue for the next two weeks and work your way to using less breaths DO NOT let your skin temperature fall below 50-55 degrees Compression Shirt & Ice: Lay down flat on your back Place a 20-40 lbs block of ice on your torso (whilst wearing compression shirt) Try to extend your time 5 minutes a time until you get to 60 minutes You will notice your skin is pink to cherry read and numb in places If you can complete the 60 minutes- remove the compression shirt and place the bag of ice directly on the skin *Note: If you develop cold urticaria at this time, this is a sign you have high levels of tissue and serum omega six content. Stop the experiment and adjust your diet until you have a blood omega six to three ratio that is below 10 to 1 using a ketogenic paleolithic diet. When you can tolerate the skin being covered for one hour with pink to cherry red skin you’re now ready for the Cold Tub step! Full Body Immersion with Ice: Fill the bathtub with cold tap water Wear socks, gloves, and a knitted cap to keep the heat in your body Add 20 lbs of ice to chest and abdomen When your body is use to the ice you can remove the socks, gloves, and cap DO NOT let your skin temperature fall below 50-55 degrees Stay for 45 minutes Continue daily 2-5 times a week Full Body Immersion with NO Ice: Jump into a pool, lake, or hot tub from the neck down Stay for 10-20 minutes Pay attention to skin color.

good luck! and stay cool! (literally)

my favorite pic

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my favorite picture (of me) of all time.

why is that?

i think to me, this picture represents a lot of the changes that i've made in my life over the past four years of being in college. (no... not becoming more of a nerd...)

this picture represents how comfortable i am with myself. if you would have asked me to pose for a picture dressed as a nerd, and then told me you were going to post in on facebook... a few years i would never have done it. wouldn't have even given it a chance.

this picture also reminds me of the semesters that i have been able to live with my sister. (you see that empty spot on the couch next to me? she goes there.) i don't know anybody that can read my mind or function on the same exact wavelength as me all the time. we know what each other is thinking so often that it is actually freaky. if we weren't two years apart we probably could be twins.

in this picture, i felt good. i look at this, and i think of being healthy, happy, and even though i was stressed out of my mind with school - i loved life. looking at this picture gives me something to strive for. a goal to reach. 

my new goal for this year:

run a half marathon. 

anyone care to run with me? 

i want to make these sooooo bad!

gingerbread "clif" bars

:)

yum.

a (jess) by any other name

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it would smell as sweet right?

i've have my fair share of nicknames growing up... 

(most of which were given to me by my dad. wassup with that?)

chief.

toad.

i actually think my dad was referring to this kind of toad...

but we'll pretend that he meant the cute one...

(this nickname was later changed to big toad as more chillins came along)

(here you have little toads 1, 2, 3, and 4)

ellis.

da beast.

jessie.

jess.

sharkgirl. (i'm taking applications for lavaboy... my future comrade/partner-in-mischief. *wink wink*)

home. well... ish.

i know that you've been getting sick of seeing pictures upon pictures of a little town i have lovingly called home over the past few months... but unfortunately, all good things have to come to an end. 

why are sleepovers so much stinkin' fun?

even just moving my bed 5 feet made the last few hours in jerusalem simply epic.

besides the fact that there was no place for my mattress...

so true... so true...

if any of you four are reading this... just because i go to a different school does not mean that you can just forget about me.

[muahaha!]

recipe for a dogpile:

one person

a) lying down on the ground

b) being forcibly thrown to the ground

+

as many enthusiastic friends as can balance on top

=

one cute pic and a whole lotta pain for joan on the bottom!

we got skillz.

...but not enough to make it all the way to the top.

good try guys.

"a" for effort!

 under the j.c...

shhhhhh!

the school rivalry never ends... not even in jerusalem!

we decided for our last day evvvver, that we would walk from bethphage to jerusalem. (this is following the route that they still go down on palm sunday every year)

this was walking downnnnnnnn... the road was quite steep actually.

hence the airplane.

ok... fine. my yoga is a little shabby.

fashionable? 

considering i've been wearing the same clothes for the last three months, i was quite excited for the change! 

i think i followed this kid for 5 minutes...

fresh. bread. smells. so. goooooooooooooooood!

gummies!!!

don't ask.

we all know that it had to end.

but none of us knew that it was going to be that hard.

you know how they tell you to rip it off like a bandaid?

you have to do it all at the same time.

you can't take half of the group and leave the rest!

but they did.

professor chaddy (chadwick) and his amazing wife kim

the first group.

this was the "sweet 16" that got stuck at jfk on the way over 3 long months ago.

hopefully their luck is better this time!

those of us who were left went out and watched our last jerusalem sunset.

the huntingtons

the camera just can't do it justice.

airplane rides - 17 hours.

airplane meals - 4.

sitting in front of a screaming child while we took off and landed? priceless. 

wanna hear a great story?

after sitting on a plane, and never thinking that i would ever see anything but the tops of clouds, crop circles and airport security... we finally landed in salt lake city!

after resurrecting my phone (for the first time in 3 whole months!) i called my ride, and found out that she hadn't gotten the memo about when i would get in.

hmmmmmm... problem!

but luckily, i had several saviors that happened to live in orem, and that were merciful enough to take a very jet-lagged, semi-conscious college student to orem to her friend's house! (thinking back, i barely remember the ride... i'm pretty sure that i thought i was more conscious than i actually was...)

the next day, i went to a friends bridal shower, called all of my family, went to ikea (and pretended like i wasn't the walking dead) and then headed back to meet with my cousins that were going to take me out to dinner.

the cousins picked me up, and we drove to bamboo hut for dinner.

the last time i went to bamboo hut was with my family.

*sniffle*

 but i only have 2 more days til i see them!

we walked in, and my cousin turned around and said, "let's sit here."

but there are people in those seats..........

it just took me a really delayed second to realize:

dad.

mom.

brooke.

whaaaaaaaaaaaat?

you guys aren't supposed to be here!!!

and then i squealed.

(i never squeal.)

best. surprise. evvvvvvver.

turns out, everyone was in cahoots.

and i had no idea.

i'm blaming it on the fact that i was suffering from a severe case of jess-has-had-absolutely-no-sleep-in-the-past-three-days...

i wasn't on the top of my sleuthing game.

we went and drove up to midway, where we got to go stay in a little swiss-themed condo.

this is more green than i've seen combined in the last three months.

it was a little bit of a shock to see hills this big... and this green.

we went for a walk after church.

(do you notice something different about this picture?) 

the drinking fountain is cool... yes.

but i have different clothes!!!

the drinking fountain was pretty fun too.

sooooo green!

i just can't get over it.

my little sis.

isn't she pretty?

:)

it's good to be home.

well... almost.